Sunday, October 12, 2008

War

When asked about war, Johnny’s response is usually something along the lines of “Where’s my fucking payment? That was high quality merchandise I sold you, Mohammad, and I demand that you make good on your end of the deal!”

However, now that he is running for President, Johnny has been asked to give a more general statement on his opinion of the state of war, in Iraq, in Afghanistan and the war on terror in general.

He’s for it.

Johnny realises what many people (the current government of the United States excepted) don’t: that war is a really good way of drumming up votes, fixing the economy (well, the economy of CEOs of large weapons manufacturers) and turning public opinion to your favour. Perfect for someone seeking political advancement.

Johnny sees the truth in the statement by Prussian general Carl von Clausewitz, who said that “war is the continuation of politics by other means.”

Of course, it could be argued that the methods Johnny was using in the first place were already pretty war-like. So let’s just say that war is the continuation of Johnny getting what he wants by more extreme – but essentially unchanged – means.

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